Meet the Family: A Personal Introduction to My Loved Ones

THE GONZALENIEWSKI'S

I have the greatest family in the world!

I love my wife and kids.

My brothers, parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews.

There is not a day that goes by that I am not eternally grateful for everyone in my life. From the many in my extended Spanish family, both in Canada and Spain and those that have welcomed me as part of their family, part of Krystina's vast brood in Northern Ontario.

I am tremendously grateful for everyone who has supported me throughout my life. The ups and downs and the times I have had to wipe myself off after failing. The ones that were there. To be gentle or kick my ass when I needed it.

And truth be told, I have needed it. I have had to get back up plenty, so I know that it is much more difficult without the right support system and mentality. Luckily, I never had to question the people in my life, even though there were times I did. I have learned the meaning of family, unconditional love and support.

What I saw in my household every day, good or bad, was my definition of what it was to be loved. The real fuel behind wanting to be a dad from a young age.

Seeing what a family was, and how they loved each other, was all I wanted.

More on my upbringing in another post.

As a child, thinking about creating my perfect family, I always wanted a family of 2 or 3 kids with the oldest being a son who can be a role model and help take care of his little sisters. See, in a household of three boys, with a mother who always wanted a little girl to dress up, all I wanted was to give her the granddaughter she never had as her daughter.

Meet the family I am full of gratitude to have.

MEET THE FAMILY

THE FIRSTBORN

Xavier was born on December 28th, 2015.

The day he was born instantly became the best day of my life.

As he grew from an infant to a toddler he was always far bigger and developmentally advanced than the "norm". And, as a first-time dad, I was curious to note how he compared. Besides sitting up, rolling over, crawling and standing early on, he walked for the first time before he was 9 months old.

Loving, caring, sympathetic, funny, artistic and athletic.

From a young age, he picked up on Dad's love for sports and had a knack for soccer, so we put him into Little Kickers. It was fun to watch little ones all in bunches chasing after the ball but there wasn't enough "soccer value" in it for the Spaniard in me.

After a few cycles, at 6, he graduated to a local soccer league and let him play for Funsies, in house league.

I also wanted to be involved with his development and may be guilty of being too involved early on. Helping with practices and coaching. Just simple things like lining up cones, or helping with running down balls. But also directly with Xavier, helping him practice and teach him

better form and positional awareness. I loved helping the kids to make sure they were ready for games. Hopefully, this will give them a chance to improve when game time comes around. Not wanting to get too involved, most team matters were left to the coach and his assistant. A first-time coach for kid's soccer, like most, and things went as you would expect. Though Xavier stood out as one of the best players on the team, and he and one of his school friends made a good duo, with a fair number of the children equally interested in picking daisies, the team won 1 game the entire season.

After an appearance in the semi-final match, decided by penalty shots, the season came to a disappointing close.

But Xavier was hooked on sports. You could tell he couldn't get enough.

He wanted to keep playing soccer and we signed him up for the rep (all-star) team of the same soccer league. Practicing the next fall/winter, indoor program with the rep team, and training with the group that would go on to represent the U9 cohort in the upcoming spring/summer outdoor season. Though a staple in the midfield and a guaranteed part of the squad in the upcoming summer season, he lost his love for it. Being bullied a bit on the team and admittedly pushed a bit too to be great by Dad that saw the potential, he wanted to try something new.

Playing every sport he could around the house and with me, as spring began in 2023 and the hype of the Toronto Blue Jays upcoming season, he saw my love for baseball and started to play. He also has a natural talent for the game.

Specifically, throwing.

Much like his father, he has a cannon on him for a big 7-year-old and we decided to give softball a try for the summer.

As he lost his confidence in the previous soccer season, and with the chance to play him in the tyke (5-9) so he could regain it, Xavier's Baseball Channel was born.

The proof is in the clips, he killed it!

He was recorded out once at bat all season long, scoring the winning run in the in-season tournament and championship game, and hitting the winning double to win the Canada Day All-Star game.

After the season, we took the gloves to Spain for our family vacation and didn't touch them. Once he arrived in the land of La Roja, all he wanted was to play soccer.

THE MIDDLE CHILD

Our eldest daughter Eva was born on April 20th, 2019.

Yes, that is right, the day Canada legalized the recreational use of marijuana. Though it is interesting to mention anecdotally, there is more significance in the date for her Lord's Lettuce-loving father than for her.

She, like any other child, is bubbly, full of life and energy and far from the thought invoked by weed culture. From birth, nicknamed "Eva the Diva", she has lived up to that role.

Opinionated. Adorable. Inquisitive. Independent. Smart.

Everything parents could want in a little girl. Being the first girl in our immediate household, we love having the little angel we always wanted.

She was spoiled with love from all sides, and in true diva fashion, she relishes the attention. There may be some middle-child syndrome in there somewhere to add to social skills much beyond her years. An amazing little girl, she makes friends easily and is already the most popular kid in her school, in junior kindergarten.

Sometimes as parents, I think we wish she, wasn't as independent and strong-willed as she is. Maybe if she was the firstborn, we would have a different opinion, but speaking for myself, I sometimes lose my patience with her just wanting to be a big girl and test her boundaries.

As the second born, and with her sister coming within 24 months, she has had fewer opportunities for sports or programs.

With a penchant for dancing and singing, she was signed up for part of the mandatory, 3-year-old, dance class. You know, like Little Kickers, but dancing.

We enrolled her in the community center dancing program where the children all work hard throughout the program to perfect the performance for their parents at the end. Though I did not attend, I am told she had a ball.

Moving forward we look at outlets to help her flex her creative muscles. Way to express herself and have fun. A princess who loves to draw, paint, sing and dance and wants to make beautiful things.

Right now, she loves going to school, and seeing her friends, drawing nice pictures for them to show them the next day. As she continues to grow and go to school, I only hope that she doesn't let the world stop her from being the friendly, loving spirit she is every day. She remains an example of happiness and a positive attitude, as observed and documented in her most recent report card.

THE YOUNGEST

When we found out that Karina was on the way, we were surprised to find out that we would have birthday twins.

You see, Xavier, was born via scheduled c-section. We then opted to follow suit for Eva. So, it was understood it would be the case for Karina. And, at about 39 weeks in, we chose December 28th, 2020 as the day she would complete our family.

We could not ask for a better final member of the clan.

Cute and in constant need of snuggles.

Seeing how, as a result of an appropriately timed surgery during childbirth, she was going to be our last child, we always obliged.

Quick to jump in your lap while watching TV or look to be picked up when going somewhere, even at 3, our little thing is loved by everyone around her. Approaching the end of her time at daycare, she will be joining her brother and sister at school next year due to a late birthday.

With a love for The Lion Guard and always bringing home new artistic creations, we can not wait to see her grow and become her little person.

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

Luckily, through some fluke of computer magic, while on a long-forgotten social networking platform for clubgoers in Toronto that will not be named, I dared to holla' at a gorgeous girl.

I thought despite being 6 years younger than me (20 vs 26), I would take my chances. I know 6 years is a large gap, but I did not see it as an 'ick', after all, my parents have the same age gap.

And, after a bit of spitting my best game and chatting back and forth, including a trip that took her and her girls down to Cuba, we finally met.

After a whirlwind, epically romantic date of crosswords and coffee at a ghetto Canadian staple, Coffee Time, in the industrial end of town we spent the next 7 consecutive days in each other's company. Most of that time in her car, Tink, the trusty Toyota Yaris, or on El Porcho (my front porch) talking about any and everything.

We were officially a couple.

Inseparable really. I knew I was in love from the second I saw that she was not an internet catfish. Having the connection we had in goals, dreams, and the way we believed that children should be raised. I knew that she was the one I was meant to be with. From then on we went on many a restaurant date and put on the customary honeymoon 15lbs (more like 55lbs). Out to the clubs with friends, because it is what you do until you are 30. Eventually moving in together into the ghetto apartment I was living in a roach-infested apartment building on the east side of the city.

We got out of there as fast as we could and left everything behind. Quickly jumping to a place closer to the hood, where I grew up in the west end where we wanted to end up to raise our family.

Fast forward to today with our gang of three amazing children in the house I was raised in. A house that we will be rebuilt for the next generation of our family to grow up in.

I struggle to type the perfect words to describe the most important people in my life in this post because it is impossible to crystallize every beautiful moment we have had and exactly what they mean to me.

There is so much more to cover. And I will continue to write about them, I am just The Ordinary Dad.

Stay tuned!